Who Are You to Judge Others?

One of the complaints I had about Christians before I became one was that they were judgemental.  Then when I did become a Christian it was something I was accused of!  It's an accusation that is sometimes accurate though.  But judging and being judgmental are two different things. 

Judging vs Judgementalism
We all make judgements every day.  Being discerning and making decisions are something we all have to do and it's unavoidable and appropriate.  Judgementalism is a critical, smug, attitude of moral superiority.  Making right judgements is a virtue while being smug is not.  Judge but don't be judgemental.

Judging Judgementalism
The statement "Who are you to judge?" is again a self defeating statement.  The person is making a judgement that you are being judgemental.  They are doing the very thing they are accusing you of.  The conversation might go something this:

Bob: Who are you to judge others? John: Why are you judging me? Bob: What? John: Why are you judging me if it's wrong to judge others? Bob: I'm just saying that Christians aren't supposed to judge others. John: Hang on a second.  You just said it's wrong to judge.  Now you're judging me.  So why are you doing the very thing you say is wrong when I do it? Bob: I'm not judging you I'm just saying it's wrong to to judge. John: OK, then I'm not judging either I'm just simply saying you're wrong.

This may take a little bit to sink in but you can see the double standard here.  The statement about judging just doesn't hold up to it's own standard.  What most people actually mean when they accuse you of judging is that you're not allowed to tell other people they're wrong.  But here we go again, they are telling you it's wrong to tell someone else they're wrong!  The relativist is now being an absolutist which is the very thing he's accusing you of.

Why is this important?  Because Christian's get attacked all the time for taking an absolute stand on issues and are trivialized for their views of exclusivity.  They are accused of being intolerant, judgemental, close-minded, and the list goes on.  Why?  Because they hold views in opposition to those making the accusations.  Most people making these statements practice the very thing they condemn.  So don't be afraid to stand up for yourself but do it with gentleness and respect for the other person even if they don't do the same for you.

Resources
"True For You, But Not For Me" by Paul Copan, Chapter 4
"Tactics" by Gregory Koukl